Have you ever noticed how many people try to push drinking onto their friends?! Like, some people cannot be out drinking alone… Clearly drinking has to happen as a group activity…uh, WRONG!! Some people don’t drink—some people don’t want to and some people cannot and should not—yet the simple “no thanks” is never enough for people. As a non-drinker myself, oftentimes I get the “just try a sip” or “one small taste won’t turn you into an alcoholic”.
We asked our long-time non-drinking friend Jordan what she says to people who push alcohol on her and how she handles it, and here was her insight:
This question is actually hard for me to answer. But here’s what I’ve got to say…
I will say that it can be a really frustrating thing to constantly feel like you’re defending your no. It shouldn’t matter what the reason behind your no is, it should just matter that you said no. Sometimes I feel like when we elaborate on our no, people start to argue with your reasons (not sure why, but they do). They try to break down your no and flip it into a yes. If you’re sober, often times that reason is “good enough” but if your no comes from somewhere besides sobriety, people dig and dig and dig and try to break you down. So remove the areas to dig from, and shut it down in the beginning. A simple no will usually peek peoples’ interest…but you don’t have to elaborate on your answer if you don’t want to.
Another trick is to make a playful little joke about it, try something like “I’m not questioning your choice to drink tonight…am I?!” I feel like when you put it into perspective like that people just have to laugh and move on to the next topic 🙂
Sometimes you will want to take the experience and educate people a tad or have some back and forth banter with them BUT sometimes you just need to shut it down.
Neither way is wrong, you just need to read the person and situation and then decide your approach, or have your mind made up ahead of time with your plan.
I was out the other day for brunch with close friends, and even they started to rag on me a bit: “I bet you’ll drink one day!””It’s not like you’re going to turn into an alcoholic after one sip.””You can taste it, it’s fine.”
Get. Off. My. Case.
I definitely think we’re changing the conversation–but in the meantime, people question things that aren’t “normal” (and I put that in quotes because what even is normal?). Eventually the tables will turn things will be more accepted, and less questioned. But until then, figure out your feelings and put a plan in place, so that you don’t feel too uncomfortable.
You can read more about Jordan’s story here. And if you’re looking for ways to internally handle the “You’d be more fun if you drank” statement, click here. And if you just wanna rep the heck out of your #SoberNotBoring life, order your shirt here!